So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I need a burrito and a hug.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Bring me that man meat
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
