Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize
