Christians are straight up FREAKS
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
