i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
