But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize