I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
When are your genitals available?
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
