Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Randomize