you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize