He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize