Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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