What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
