thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize