problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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