At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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