I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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