Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
