i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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