he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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