yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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