He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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