FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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