My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize