im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
