Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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