If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
