Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Randomize
