So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Randomize
