He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
