at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Randomize
