At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
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