Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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