If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Randomize
