Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
