i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Randomize
