My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
