Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize