We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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