Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
