I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I'm jealous of your bromance
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
