is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Randomize
