...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
