I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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