Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
