I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
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