What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize