Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
