so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
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