all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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