So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
