apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
