he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
